Wednesday, June 24, 2015

7 weeks

They have begun - the summer holidays. 
Seven whole weeks. 
49 days. 
I'm going to be brutally honest; I am dreading them. 
Many a mum has chatted excitedly about the lack of routine, the care free days, kids being kids.
The fun. The excitement.
"Enjoy the holidays!"
And inside I cry.

Seven whole weeks.
The days are not care free.
Physiotherapy - AFOs, standing frame, stretches and massage.
Transfers, lifts - bed, toilet, wheelchair, toilet, sofa, standing frame, wheelchair, and on and on...
Planning, double guessing, and planning some more.
Questions, demands, bickering.
Balancing the needs of my children, forgoing the needs of myself.
The impact, physically and emotionally, unpredictable.

I am dreading the holidays.
Anxiety is running high.
Panic that the burden will be too great, panic that I will break, lies close beneath the surface.
Seven weeks.
49 days. 
"Enjoy the holidays!"

Monday, June 22, 2015

"Don't worry about..."

D is a truly awesome daddy to our wonderful girls and as I wrote in his card "we are learning together, each and every day, that there is always more to parenting than first imagined." This aside - because life is one continuous learning opportunity - D is perfect just the way he is and is loved unconditionally and wholly as a result.

F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote a letter to his eleven year daughter in 1933. His sage advice is still relevant now - some not so much, however - and, with mosquitoes, flies and insects in general excluded, it reads like advice D would give the girls now.  There is much to learn from D and he has so much to give.

"Things to worry about:

Worry about courage
Worry about Cleanliness
Worry about efficiency
Worry about horsemanship
Worry about. . .

Things not to worry about:

Don't worry about popular opinion
Don't worry about dolls
Don't worry about the past
Don't worry about the future
Don't worry about growing up
Don't worry about anybody getting ahead of you
Don't worry about triumph
Don't worry about failure unless it comes through your own fault
Don't worry about mosquitoes
Don't worry about flies
Don't worry about insects in general
Don't worry about parents
Don't worry about boys
Don't worry about disappointments
Don't worry about pleasures
Don't worry about satisfactions

Things to think about: 

What am I really aiming at?
How good am I really in comparison to my contemporaries in regard to:

(a) Scholarship
(b) Do I really understand about people and am I able to get along with them?
(c) Am I trying to make my body a useful instrument or am I neglecting it?"